Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
