I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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