life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
