It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
There r osticjed everywhere
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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