this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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