its not stalking. its research.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
