come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
