i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
