i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
