I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
