I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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