p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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