I wanna bring you to show and tell
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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