I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
worst night to have a conscience
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
