Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
