We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
