If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
