i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize