He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
