I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
