I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Found the puke drawer
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
