I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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