their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
