no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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