You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
