Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Two words: blizzard sex
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
