do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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