and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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