The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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