i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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