I didn't shave. On purpose
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
