My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
