Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
