hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
