We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
How's work?
Spinning.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
