I'm so fucking centered right now
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize