So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
