I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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