I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
