Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
