And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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