he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
