I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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