Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
