The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
