I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize