My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
