sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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