Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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