Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
