Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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